Wednesday, August 30, 2006

100 Things

This seems like a reasonable way to kill some time.

100 things about SmarshyBoy

1. "Smarshy" is a mixture of my first and last names.
2. I love artichokes
3. I named my daughter after my mother and my sister (they have the same name, obviously)
4. I'm a big dude - 6 foot 5 inches tall
5. My brother and I are 355 days apart in age (no infertility for my mother)
6. My brother is older than me, but I love those 10 days when we are the same age
7. His wife pops out kids like it's going out of style.
8. My parents got divorced after almost 40 years of marriage
9. Both of them would give absolutely anything to go back in time and reverse that decision
10. For a variety of reasons, that's not possible (my dad got remarried and my mom hates him...also, time travel not possible yet)
11. I went to a fancy boarding school in the Northeast, where I had to wear coat and tie every day to school
12. I used to hate math.
13. I made it through 4 years of college without ever having to take a math class.
14. I now have a MBA with a concentration in Finance (aka math)
15. I have size 13 feet (you know what that means...)
16. I would love to rip out Kevin Federline's heart with my bare hands and show it to him while it's still beating
17. I have an undergraduate degree in Broadcasting and Film Production
18. I was born in Beaumaris, a suburb of Melbourne, Australia
19. As a result, I have dual US / Australian citizenship
20. I was raised in a nice town in Connecticut (my parents are American)
21. While in college, I spent a semester studying at Sydney University in Australia. At a bar, I met a girl who coincidentally lived in the same town as me in Connecticut, also studying at Sydney Uni. We dated for 4 years.
22. I think Paris Hilton is a disgusting skank.
23. If I was single, I'd probably have sex with her.
24. I hate the way raw cotton feels. I can't bring myself to touch it.
25. I used to be an actor in Hollywood in my early 20's.
26. I had tiny bit parts in Friends, ER, Jurrassic Park, and Without Limits.
27. I showed my wife my membership card to the Screen Actors Guild on our first date. That nailed it.
28. I work in venture capital for a huge global company that would love to fire me for naming them on my blog
29. Sometimes, it is very clear to me that my 2 year old daughter really, really loves me.
30. That is the single best feeling I have ever had in my 35 years of life.
31. I drive a Volvo (pussy...)
32. I married my wife on a big lawn by the beach in Montego Bay, Jamaica.
33. I used to smoke cigarettes (not much though)
34. I love coffee
35. I enjoy gardening, but not when its too hot
36. I love scotch.
37. Despite the fact that I used to be an actor, I have total disdain for all actors and Hollywood types.
38. I secretly read my wife's People Magazine (gotta know your enemies).
39. My least favorite kind of people are those with little self-awareness.
40. I spent one week per month working in Moscow in 2004 and early 2005.
41. I can name all the Teletubbies, as well as every single character on Sesame Street
44. My commute to work is about 1 hour each way.
45. I have 2 sisters.
46. I live less than a mile from the beach.
47. I don't understand why, after buying new furniture, it takes 10 weeks to be delivered.
48. I usually go to sleep around 9:30 pm
49. My alarm goes off every morning at 5:07 am
50. Autumn is my favorite season.
51. I asked my wife to marry me on a Thursday in late 2001
52. Before I was born, my mother had a son who died of SIDS at 14 months.
53. She's been a little "off" ever since then.
54. I react to stress by getting very sleepy.
55. The day of our last BFN, I slept for 3 hours.
56. I think cocktail onions are delicious.
57. My wife and I love to spend time on the island of Nantucket.
58. After I graduated from business school, I was unemployed for 15 months.
59. During my unemployement, my wife helped support us by making preppy belts and selling them online and in boutique stores.
60. She did this at home after working a full 9 hour day at her real job.
61. My wife no longer works.
62. My favorite color is blue.
63. I'm pretty sure I suffer from Seasonal Affectation Disorder (I get sad in the wintertime)
64. When I was a kid, I once ran away from home and hid in a big bush across the street. When I was sure everyone was freaking out, I finally went home. No one knew I had been gone.
65. I'm an independant, but I think America is going in the wrong direction.
66. I think the US has squandered alot of goodwill we used to have in the world.
67. When entertainers talk about politics, I get filled with rage.
68. I've been married for almost 4 years, and I've never met my mother in law (issues....)
69. I can make sushi
70. I once met Billy Joel.
71. After I graduated from college, my first job was working as Christian Slater's personal assistant on the film "Bed of Roses".
72. That was the worst fucking job I ever had. I was awful at it.
73. The best job I ever had was working as a launch boat driver at a yacht club on Long Island Sound.
74. I'm not one of those people who will have a difficult time retiring.
75. I have driven across the USA 5 times
76. I suffer from road rage in a BIG way
77. I snore loudly.
78. I think the most serious threat to our world is the dangerous mixture of ignorance and conviction.
79. On average, I eat 2 bananas every day
80. My wife is addicted to EBay.
81. I have a re-occuring dream about a house I have never seen in real life.
82. I dream about that house every single night, with no exception.
83. I tend to sweat alot.
84. I have a phobia about being in a bar or movie theater by myself.
85. I am a total slob.
86. I clean up pretty well.
87. The closest family member to me is 4 hours away by car.
88. I am fascinated by medicine and science and I wish I had become a doctor.
89. Sometimes I worry about the effect all this negative infertility stuff is having on my daughter.
90. I love to play video games. Especially James Bond- ish spy games.
91. I have never been arrested.
92. I have done things I should have been arrested for.
93. I had an internship at an Austalian radio station. They put me on the air every day.
94. I think the girl at my drycleaner has a crush on me.
95. She has GIGANTIC droopy boobs.
96. I don't floss as much as I should.
97. I secretly wonder if anyone does (besides dental hygenists).
98. I continue to take my daughter to swimming class, despite the fact that she screams the entire time.
99. My favorite drink at Starbucks in a grande non-fat no whip white mocha.
100. I don't listen to my wife nearly as much as I should.

The End.


serenity said...

Holy sh*t are we like twins separated at birth or something????

I got through college without ever taking a math class (English lit degree), and now I'm a MBA AND a CPA (did the whole accounting thing instead of the finance track). I was also unemployed for a LOOOOOONG time.

So what if I've never been to Australia, I'm 5 years younger than you, and you're WAY taller than me... we both live on the North Shore, and we're both dealing with infertility.


Thanks for stopping by my blog - I'd like to add you to my list. (Mother may I?)

And definitely get flowers. Flowers for no reason at all - a very good thing. You'll look like a hero. :)

Hope548 said...

I thought I left a comment on one of your previous posts, but I couldn't find it, or else I've lost my mind!
I like your blog. (sorry, yet another chick reader). You seem to really understand the implications of infertility, and like all husbands you would just like to have your happy wife back. It's wonderful you've had success once and I don't blame either of you for wanting a second.
My hubby doesn't get it quite the way you seem to, but he tries. Most times he just holds me if I need to be held and says he's sorry. It's better than him saying something stupid!
I hope the IUI is successful.

Keeping The Faith said...

Hilarious- You have a great sense of humor... ahhh shit- did I just inflate your ego. LOL I'll let it go this one time since I truly believe we'd all be wallowing...possibly drowning in a mud pile if we couldn't laugh and enjoy ourselves... even in the worst circumstances. It will take me a while to get over the fact that you would bang Paris Hilton.

It was refreshing to see a guy's point of view. More men should blog. I bet many lurk...maybe you will be their inspiration. Maybe of us females will throw your link our husband's way... I'd love my husband to have an outlet. It is also important for the women to realize that this isn't all about us. Sometimes it's hard since we do the majority of the treatments, appts, etc.

At times I admit that I am angry that I am the one that has to be the drugged lab rat, a chemistry project, a hormonal roller coaster... but deep down I know my J would trade places in a second if he could.

I wish you much luck on this journey. Thanks for stopping by on my blog. I'll be checking in on you.

-Faith get to work :-)

theoneliner said...

Well, if you know Mony, you can't be all that bad.

I think having one child might make you want another one even more than if you had none.

I wonder if my hubbie would like your blog? He gets infertility...most of the time.

Welcome to the blogging world.

Just another Jenny said...

Shit, now I'll have to watch every friends episode to see if I can spot you. Great list!

LabiaLady said...

Beaumaris eh? Interesting...

Mony said...

Dude...Are you flirting with us?

I do believe a fan club is emerging. I am loving your list Beaumaris Boy, now pass the scotch...and the cigarettes.

songbird36 said...

Hey SB! Your blog is hilarious and insightful...I agree with the others that more men should blog about the crap hand that we've been dealt. I'm going to send my husband your way. You all have a lot in common (loud snoring, noticing if a woman is droopy, ect...)

Thanks for giving us a male perspective and good luck to you and your wife. (Be patient, she'll come back.)

aah0424 said...

Your blog is great! I'm glad I stopped by.

I am also intriqued that you have the same dream every night about the same house that you've never really seen IRL! Past life or something?

Southern Comfortable said...

Just found you through Serenity. I'm so glad to see that there's a guy out there blogging about all this. I'd love to link to you, too, if that's okay.

I do wish guys had a place they could talk about infertility issues. My husband is incredible at dealing with me, but I can imagine he'd love a guy's point of view on everything we're going through. I'm going to send him a link to you.

Judging my the number of comments you've got, I'd say you have quite a following already!

soralis said...

Just reading your blog... sorry another girl!! :) I am so sorry for what you and your wife are going through. (We are currenlty doing the secondary IF thing after 10 years of primary IF)

Take care

fisher queen said...

Now I'll know some of what my husband really thinks. I'm going to send your link to him.

Two comments on previous posts: if your wife had such a good response on an IUI that they converted her to IVF, she should relax about her age a bit. Response is a good indicator for egg quality. Also, on another post, a funky period after being on progesterone is very normal. Slap the nurse who should have been able to tell you that.

NikkiNix said...

1. size 13 feet - what the hell??
2. Jeez, at least I ble*p out my fu*k*ng expletives ;)
3. Droopy boobs... you're so honest, I love reading your sh*t :)