Hi everyone, thanks for your nice comments about the Buggins! I really appreciate it when people say nice things about her. I'm crazy about her.
I still can't quite bring myself to create a post of any significance. I originally started blogging because I thought it would bring me and M hope, but lately I think it's been having the opposite affect on me. It's making me feel hopeless. This is a community of people who I have grown to care about a great deal, so I feel each setback and negative event that befalls any of you acutely, as if it were happening to me. I would feel the positive events too, but there just seems to be a dearth of those. I'm not going anywhere, though. I'm far too involved in all your stories to disappear now. I just don't have much to contribute at this point.
I'm in shock over Kellie's news. If you haven't already, please visit her and offer a kind word.
M and I are still on the rollercoaster, and at every twist and turn she is screaming to get off the ride. The social worker we *have* to see together I'm sure thinks we're a couple of nutjobs.
The latest drama was that the box of fertility meds arrived, and when M opened it and saw how many shots and boxes of drugs were in it, she reacted literally as if she had opened the box and found a severed head inside. I was traveling that day, and I got calls on my cell phone while I was in a meeting and she was literally hyperventilating into the phone. She decided right then that the cycles was cancelled.
The next morning she decided she would try to continue the cycle.
That afternoon she cancelled it again.
Today its back on.
I'm going fucking crazy.