Don't worry, this post has nothing to do with poop. Or with anything having to do with my digestive tract, either upper OR lower.
My confession today is much more serious than that. My confession is that I lust after, and am in love with, someone who is not my wife.
Who is it, you ask? I won't hide it. I'll tell you, because I'm proud of it. It's those little animated weather girls on some of your blogs. You know the ones, they are standing there, in sexy clothing, arms playfully behind their backs, eyes raised slightly upward in a "come hither" glance. Left leg kicked out a bit in a subtle sign of rebellion. Maybe showing just a bit of midriff. Right in the middle of the box entitled "Weather in My Corner of the World". Jenny from The Infertility Block has one. So does Hope548. I love Songbird's too. I waste hours of my day staring at them, wishing I could "weird science" them out of the blogosphere and into my home. And it's not just lust, I'll have you know. It's true love. And I know it's reciprocated. I mean, you CAN'T tell me they don't love me too. Just look how they look at me, all pouty and a little naughty. Oh yeah, baby. I know the weather. And the weather is HOT!
And no, this is not the first time I've had sexual feeling towards a cartoon (I prefer to call them "Animated Americans"). I mean, what red blooded American pre-teen didn't have a soft spot (or a hard spot, as it were) for Jessica Rabbit? But it was when I first laid eyes on Josey and The Pussycats that I first knew what it meant to be a man.
I know that society will condemn us, and our love. They are afraid of that which they do not understand. Our love trandscends human understanding. And we will likely not be able to be together in this life. But there is always the afterlife, my loves.
Until then, when you bloggers are reviewing your stats and you see a ton of hits from the Boston area in the middle of the night, be not alarmed. I'm just spending some quality time with my ladies.